Zombies invade Monroeville Mall. Photo by Kristy Locklin.
In 1968, director George A. Romero filmed the groundbreaking horror classic “Night of the Living Dead” in and around Pittsburgh, making our town the Zombie Capital of the World.
It’s a no-brainer that the 412 would be the place to be if reanimated corpses started wreaking havoc. Yet, somehow, Pittsburgh didn’t even crack the Top 10 in Lawn Love’s list of the Best Cities for Surviving a Zombie Apocalypse in 2021!
We think they’re dead wrong.
In a detailed blog post, the lawn care company, which operates in more than 900 neighborhoods across the U.S., named Huntington Beach, California, as the best spot to ride out hell on Earth. The researchers, who were inspired by the CDC’s tongue-in-cheek zombie apocalypse preparedness guide, cited the seaside town’s healthy population and high mobility as key factors to its safe haven status.
Pittsburgh comes in at No. 23 on a list of 200 metropolitan areas, but we did beat out our neighbors Cleveland (71) and Philadelphia (85) — and Laredo, Texas, which came in dead last.
Here’s what Lawn Love (perhaps they do a lot of cemetery maintenance?) said about their findings:
“We compared the 200 biggest U.S. cities on 23 key indicators of zombie-preparedness — from the share of the living population in good health to the share of available homes with basements to hunting gear access. Use our rankings and in-depth analysis to help you prepare to fight the undead. Remember: If you ever encounter an actual zombie, aim for the head!”
Yinz guys know that those Hollywood starlets can’t compete with hardscrabble ghoul hunters from Western Pennsylvania! We know how to handle horror.
As evidenced by Romero’s movies, Monroeville Mall and the Wampum Underground are excellent end-of-the-world hideouts (as long as cool heads prevail). And, with resident experts such as Tom Savini on our side, we think we’d get a handle on the situation before it spiraled out of control, n’at.
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